Q: “I applied early to a school that I thought I had my heart set on. Now, I am afraid that school will be too challenging and too far from home. These second thoughts keep plaguing me. Is this normal?”
A: Yes. Yes, it is completely normal to second-guess yourself when you’ve made such a major decision as applying early to a school. Even though you had your heart set on going to that school, you just made a huge leap and the outcome is not in your hands anymore. Now it’s up to a powerful set of strangers to decide your fate… that’s some scary stuff! It’s only natural to feel that maybe you made the wrong choice. But you’re not alone, it happens all the time in a variety of settings. (Think: buyer’s remorse.)
To get through this anxiety, it is important for you to do a few things. First, check to see if you applied Early Action or Early Decision. If you applied EA, then your admission won’t be binding so you are free to make another decision if you so choose. All the school will do is let you know that you got in, but you will still have until spring (usually May 1st) to give them your decision. If this is how you applied, then you’re in the clear.
If you applied ED, then the admissions decision is binding and you might have to go despite your feelings. If this is the case, try to remember what attracted you to the school in the first place. There had to be something that you loved, something that made you want to apply there first. Was it… the location? The people? The programs? Whatever it was, thinking about it might help you fall back in love with the school so that you don’t dread going there if you get in. Going on a second campus visit might also be helpful in this process. Who knows, maybe you’ll find something new to like!
Your thoughts about the school being “too challenging and too far from home” are a little troubling for me, because it sounds like you are questioning yourself more than the school itself. You’ll never know if the school is hard until you try it out, and you’ll never know if the school is too far away until you go. I have a feeling that these self-depreciating thoughts are the result of your indecision about applying early, rather than a real doubt about your abilities. You took the time to apply, so obviously you didn’t always have these feelings. You’re awesome. Just own it.
It is key for you to realize that this whole college admissions process if going to be a roller coaster. Throughout the ride, you’ll feel the exhilarating rush just as much as you feel the motion sickness. You’re at a huge turning point in your life, so it’s natural to feel indecisive and question you decisions at every turn. You just have to trust that it will all work out in the end.
